Sunday, July 25, 2010

And How Was Your Morning? (or, one more reason why I hate shopping at Target)

Target is one of those stores that I just hate to go into to. Sure, the place is usually clean and organized enough, and almost never crowded. I assume this last point is because I'm not alone in my hesitancy to shop there.

Basically, as a place to shop, Target is nice.
But, as a place to buy stuff, Target generally sucks.
They don't have anything. Shelves, long aisles of full shelves, with nothing on them that I want.

And that is why I avoid the place. I'm a Wal*Mart guy. I can buy stuff there (and get my oil changed at the same time.)

So, I should have known things were not going to go as planned this morning. I woke up early and headed out to do some yard work. I was out of beer, and would need to get some.
The wife suggested, since I was headed that way... (not really, but it's The Wife, ya know) that I stop at Walgreen's (in a different direction) and get my beer there while I pick those pictures she ordered.

O.K. No problem.

Got the pictures, but Walgreen's didn't have beer (yet). (It's a newer store. "Beer is coming", they say.)

As I'm leaving Walgreen's for the liquor store the wife calls and 'reminds' me to pick up her prescription, requiring me to re-park and re-enter Walgreen's (and now you know why I try to avoid carrying a cell phone).
And the ATM at the drug counter is down. Not wanting to wait in the longer line, I fork out my beer cash. Target, with it's empty parking lot and lack of customers, is just right across the street, next to Home Depot, where I can pick up those sprinkler heads I was gonna replace next weekend.
And they got beer.
Lot's of beer.
There I can use the ATM, and be out in a hurry, saving me a couple extra miles to the liquor store... the phone rings again when Wife requests that I pick up milk since I'm going to be at Target, anyway... ('member what I said about cell phones?).

At Home Depot, pick up two sprinkler heads in just a few quick minutes...
and then to Target, where I can finally get that beer I had originally left the house for.

I grab the milk, two cold six's, and head straight for checkout.
I'm moving fast now...
already losing patience with the whole morning, and it's barely nine o'clock.

"May I see your I.D.?"
I look up at the snot-nose behind the counter. "Huh?"
"I need to see your I.D... For the beer."
"No you don't."
"Sorry,Sir. Store policy."
"Sorry Son, I don't have it." (I left it at home)
"Then I can't ring you up"
"Says who?"
"I can't. It's built into the system. I have to swipe your I.D. in order to ring up the sale."
"Call your supervisor."
"He can't over ride it, either. He's right there."
Supervisor comes over and explains the facts of life to to me. He's real nice about it. Genuinely regretful. Nobody, not even the store manager, has the means to over ride the system for alcohol purchases. It's all set up from corporate, and it's a lame idea (his words).

They ring up the milk. I swipe the ATM, and get beer cash.
Looks like I'm headed back in the original opposite direction to get what it was I had left the house for in the first place.

And proving my point: Target has nothing for me to buy even when they do. Screw those people. I hate that store.

Finally, I get home. Got beer, and pictures, and prescriptions, and ... oops...
In my harried mood, I had left the milk back at Target, sitting on the counter.
Hell, they can keep it.
I'm not going back.

Wife greets me at the door:
"Thank you, Honey. Did you get the milk?"
"Sorry, Baby. They didn't have any."


Mr. D said...

I worked for Target for 8 1/2 years. Send a link of this to and cc:

Steinhafel is the CEO and, last time I checked, Berg was the head of the West Coast region. They'd love to hear from you. I'll bet you get beer, a refund for your milk and vouchers. They hate bad publicity.

my name is Amanda said...

Hm, no sympathy here this time! Californians are totally spoiled. (And now I am, I admit it.) You can buy beer ANYWHERE. Target?! Walgreens?! Seriously?! Dude, it is not that easy in Minnesota (and other prudish states).

My mother worked for Wal-Mart for over a decade, she's pretty awesome, and they treated her like s***. So they can go to h-e-double-hockey-sticks.

(It sounds like I'm angry - I'm really not angry. I simply have plenty of reasons for not shopping there.)

Bike Bubba said...

Now come on, Gino; when they card you, TAKE THE COMPLIMENT! :^)

Personally, my take is that when Target gets things worth buying, I'll shop there. Same deal with Wal-Mart. There are a few things worth buying there, but in too many cases, they've simply "cost reduced" the quality out of too many goods.

Brian said...

Man I just can't stand WalMart. I don't care about all the things that people bitch about WalMart for, I just find being there tremendously unpleasant. Disorganized, dirty, crowded, too many children. My impression has been that the prices at Target are actually pretty comparable (at least close enough for me not to care), but I will admit to not having researched this thoroughly.

Now that I live in Seattle, though, the nearest WalMart is in a pretty far-flung 'burb, so it's a moot point anyway.

I also admit that I will frequently eat the extra $ and just buy stuff at the Safeway across the street or the Walgreens around the corner to avoid driving to Target (the nearest one is about 6 traffic-filled miles away).

Anonymous said...

Just have very specific things I buy in each because they have the best deals for those things. At least in this area.

Beer in a Walgreens or Target. Not no way, not no how! Liquor stores only.


Gino said...

squeaky: we have beer everywhere here, where liquor store means mom/pop shop that sells smokes,candy and other conveniences that also holds a liquor license. we dont have true 'Liquor Stores' run by the state.

amanda: i heard that about those who work there, and i've heard the opposite as well. my friend's wife has worked walmart 15yrs. she likes it and plans on staying for ever.

bubba: but the guy necessities, you need those: razor blades, work shirts, fresh socks, soap and beer at good prices, and thats what its all about. i dont shop. i just buy.

brian: the prices are only comparable if they have the item you're looking for, and normally they dont.
walmart, though, is cleaner and better organised depending on the side of town you are, and the predominant language spoken there. if i told you what side had the nice walmart, somebody here might call me a racist again.

mark: thank for the tip. would those vouchers be good at walmart, where they never run out of my brand of razor blades?

Bike Bubba said...

Gino; agreed on jeans and razor blades, but working in a cubicle, Wal-Mart doesn't have a lot for me in terms of work attire.

(even though I also spend a certain amount of time in the machine shop)

kr said...

Hilarious rant :). Poor you : P.

Mrs. D said...


Guess you don't want to go school supply shopping with me, Fearless Maria and Benster at Target :)