Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Nickleback Comes To Hollywood

Have you ever pondered the number of cord combinations to be made with a guitar? I haven't either, but I remember reading about it somewhere how that there were only a finite number of ways to 'mix it up', so to speak, before creative redundancy would set in, and take with it the future of modern music.
More specifically: "someday rock n roll would cease to rock or roll" was the general gist of the article.

This gist, though interesting, is pretty much threatened with the success of Nickleback.
But that is another bitch for another day.

And this brings me to Julia Roberts, because Julia Roberts is the Nickleback of Hollywood. With every movie she makes, you are left saying "I've seen this shit before" because you have. You've seen the same story in her last movie, based around her previous character, who is a lot like the next role she'll take on in her next film that is just a borrowed plot from her previous one.
And is just one reason why I do not bother to investigate the possibility of seeing any more Julia flicks. I've already seen them all. That is enough. And it helps that I'm not dating anymore.

I really don't care about Julia, but only bring her up lead to a larger point.

And that is :I don't expect much from most actors or actresses. I've usually been fairly satisfied seeing the same type-cast actors playing the same type of character. I'm not that snobbish, I'm easy to please, and as to the finer points of cinema and acting... I'm just like 'yeah, whatever.'

But, I would like to believe that the human mind is deeper than a guitar, with a limitless supply of new ideas.
Even more so when there are seemingly limitless millions of dollars to chase the good ideas into fruition.
You know, all those good ideas that supposedly reside in the creative minds of the creatively blessed writers and producers, who's raison d'etre is to create stuff, put it up on a wide screen, and charge me $11 for the privilege of telling you if it sucked or not.?

Yeah, those ideas.

But no.
What we've had the last couple years is cartoons made into movies. Well, we are now out of cartoons and comic books. So now what?

I'll tell you what. It's remakes.
Yeah, that's it. They'll remake all the cool shit from the 70's and 80's for no other reason than to remake it.
So right now we have 'Last Of The Titans' now playing. This is just the most recent.
Coming soon, 'The Karate Kid'.

'Red Dawn' is also in the pipe.

Eventually 'Death Wish', 'Rosemary's Baby', 'Logan's Run', '10', 'Footloose' and even 'The Dirty Dozen' will show the utter bankruptcy of Hollywood's imagination.

Even 'Highlander' will show us there can be more than one as another set of sequels is part of the plan.

Stretch out the yellow tape.
Chalk the outline.
We're dead.
Move along. Nothing to see here.

Way to go, Hollywood.
Rock on.


my name is Amanda said...

Gino, you have a very good point. Though I think that the big money isn't about the most creative writers and directors, but the writers and directors most willing to create things that appeal to the "masses." One of the problems with that thinking isn't just the fact that they are producing crap, but that despite 15 years worth of evidence that female-oriented (as in, the female is the main character) and African-American-oriented films, are incredibly successful, filmmakers are still obsessed with the idea that the teenage male is the biggest money maker! Anyway, I have faith that despite the retreads of 60s and 70s stuff and comic books (there are still tons of graphic novels to make into films - have you seen "Kick-Ass?"), humans still have the ability to create something new, thought-provoking and relevent. Stuff comes out every year. Although it's definitely not in the majority. (Actually, I hear "Kick-Ass" isn't your cup of tea if you're not into a ton of violence...and I'm not, but I'm intrigued because it's been getting some good reviews.)

Brian said...

My rule of thumb at this point is that the odds of me liking a movie are inversely proportional to the size of its marketing budget. Which of course means that if I've heard of it I probably won't like it.

K-Rod said...

Microwave Massacre

Gino said...

brian: i'm easy to please once i've made my mind to see the movie.
its just that there is so little i want to see anymore.

amanda: yer probably right, as per the money just chasing the wrong stuff. the better ones i've seen the past few yrs were almost all euro.
europe tends to suck in all catagories in comparison to the USA, but they are clearly kicking our asses in cinema.

K-Rod said...

Seen it all, eh?

So what did you think of Microwave Massacre?

Brian said...

I have to admit I kind of want to see the kk reboot with Jackie Chan as Mr miyagi

Gino said...

i never heard of microwave massacre.

brian: that is one remake i absolutely refuse to see.
there can be only one miyagi.

W.B. Picklesworth said...

I don't think that there are limitless ideas. It's possible that the very idea of a "movie" will have to change in order for there to be fresh stories.

Or, maybe they could become more like jazz. There would be standards that would get reinterpreted all the time. The interest would be in the little twists. I'm not sure how well that translates to movies, though.

K-Rod said...

If you've never seen Microwave Massacre then you ain't seen it all. It is, with out a doubt, one of the best budget "B" movies ever made!!! Staring Jackie Vernon!!!